Men and women should not be too clingy. Marriage is more likely to last. Sexual obstacles are related to psychology.

The survey shows that more than half of women aged 40 to 50 suffer from sexual dysfunction. Experts point out that "among patients visiting the men's department, many reasons for the disharmony in their married life are closely related to the wife." said the gender expert. In addition, after some male patients came to the andrology department for treatment, it was found that the problem was mainly with their spouse, not the man. Experts point out that sufficient attention should also be given to female sexual dysfunction.

According to the center's survey on sexual function of spouses of more than 1,000 patients with sexual dysfunction, about 10% of spouses of patients under 30 years old also have sexual dysfunction; among patients aged 30-40, 20.6% of spouses have sexual dysfunction; among patients aged 40-50, more than 50% of spouses have sexual dysfunction.

"The problems that men have in sex also exist in women, and they are mutually corresponding." Therefore, experts call for that when either spouse experiences sexual dysfunction, the other should also actively cooperate in adjustment and treatment. Physiological diseases are an important cause of sexual dysfunction in women. First of all, women's endocrine function is an important factor affecting their sexual function. Endocrine dysfunction can lead to problems such as vaginal dryness, affecting sexual intercourse.

In addition to physiological reasons, female sexual dysfunction is also closely related to psychological factors. For example, previous disharmonious sexual experiences and incorrect understanding of sex may affect women's attitude towards sex at the psychological level.

Experts also pointed out that when the wife does not have endocrine problems or external genital inflammation, if she still has dysfunctions such as sexual arousal during intercourse, she can use some drugs to treat male erectile dysfunction under the guidance of a doctor to help treat it. The main effect of these drugs is to help dilate blood vessels and improve blood flow.

Female sexual interest and desire disorder: loss or decrease in sexual interest or desire.

Subjective sexual arousal disorder: lack of or markedly reduced sensation of any type of sexual arousal (sexual excitement and pleasure). But other signs of physical reaction still appear.

Sexual aversion: Extreme anxiety or disgust when anticipating or attempting sexual activity.

A perfect and long-lasting marriage should be like a warm pot of essential oil. The basic tone is sweet and rich love, blended with respect, understanding, and tolerance, and dotted with countless tenderness and fragrance.

Huang Weiren, a professor at Northwestern University School of Medicine, is known as the "Doctor of Love." In his book "The Secret of Living in Love", he pointed out that the different understandings of marriage between the two sexes lead to different levels of satisfaction with marriage. Often when a husband rates his marital satisfaction at 7, his wife only gives it 2. This is called the "temperature difference" in marriage. "People who want to maintain their marriage need to have a more objective understanding of the current state of their marriage. Taking the temperature of the marriage is a good way to do it."

Just like human body temperature, the ideal marriage temperature should be kept constant at around 37 degrees Celsius. Huang Weiren pointed out that such couples treat each other with respect, love and laughter, and although they may quarrel when they have different opinions, they can always find ways to understand each other and resolve conflicts in a reasonable way.

Everyone hopes that their love will be passionate. If the marriage is like this and remains high for a long time, it is easy to "have a fever" and burn each other. Huang Weiren believes that some couples are always confronting each other. Both of them are very opinionated and say whatever they want. When they quarrel, they become very emotional and speak very loudly. When people are emotional, they will inevitably say angry words. If there is no timely explanation and communication afterwards, it will easily hurt the partner's self-esteem.

Some wives are too clingy and regard their husbands as their "private property". They want to be with them every day and demand to know their husbands' every move, which keeps the temperature of their marriage high at all times. This kind of dependent mentality just shows that the wife is spiritually empty or immature. They hope that the other party can accept themselves unconditionally at any time and place and put themselves first. But in the adult world, it will not work to use any form of force on others to satisfy your own psychological needs.

And sometimes, the temperature of a marriage can drop to freezing point. In such a marriage, the couple will avoid conflicts for a long time, fail to communicate when encountering problems, and the grudges in their hearts will grow deeper and deeper, until they finally become "cold to each other when they meet." There is an old Chinese saying that "there is no greater sorrow than a dead heart." Couples avoid conflicts because they bring pain to both parties. But in the long run, it will take a lot of effort to heal the marriage.

Therefore, if you want to maintain the perfect temperature of marriage, it is most important to learn and be good at communication. Huang Weiren believes that communication is to express one's own ideas and to understand the other party's ideas, rather than to deny or make personal attacks. For example, if the husband is going out for a social event and the wife is not happy about it, she may complain, "You have been out a lot recently, and we haven't had dinner together for a long time. I feel lonely." This is a complaint. The wife is calmly expressing the troubles caused by her husband's going out.

But if the wife angrily says, "You are always like this, just going out to play by yourself," then it becomes an accusation. To change your partner's overly clingy behavior, on the one hand, you should tell your partner truthfully that you need independent space and social activities. An understanding partner will generally be able to accept this. On the other hand, you might as well encourage them to develop their own interests, hobbies and social circles.

In addition, a study by John Gutmann, a psychology professor at the University of Washington, found that men who help their wives wash dishes and express their emotions have happier marriages and live longer. Although the reasons for this study cannot be explained more scientifically at present, one thing is certain: as long as the husband can do this and speak boldly, it will be helpful to the marriage.