Everyone wants a life with a harmonious sexual connection

Although the saying goes that women are "wolves at thirty and tigers at forty", in reality, many women of this age are troubled by a boring life in bed.

So, does he really not love you anymore or do you no longer have feelings for him? Did you misunderstand him or did he misunderstand you?

analyze

A. He doesn't ask, I don't tell

Many couples are not as keen on communicating and exchanging feelings as described in fashion magazines. The opposite is true. Women, in particular, are not even willing to understand and evaluate their sex life from the perspective of exchange. This is the root cause of misunderstandings between partners, because the more this is the case, the more difficult it is to recognize the other person's contribution to yourself, and the less likely you are to make corresponding returns. The most common mistake is that he has actually put a lot of effort into pleasing you and coordinating your sex life, but because you have no communication, he cannot be targeted and you cannot feel it accurately.

So there was a serious misunderstanding. Of course, the mutual devotion and reward between partners in their sex life are generally tacitly understood and rarely expressed in words. But this kind of "exchange" actually does exist, and precisely because the party who makes the sacrifice will not say it explicitly, the other party is more likely to ignore it and more likely to hurt the other party unintentionally.

B. He wants to, but I don’t.

There is a lack of agreement between partners on the psychological timing of choosing sexual intercourse. One party may feel that having sex at this time is natural, but the other party may feel that they are doing it reluctantly and are paying a price. If the former does not understand and appreciate this, and does not make due returns in other ways or in other aspects, the latter will feel that they are suffering a loss, or even being forced or exploited. Over time, every little shadow accumulates, and the relationship (emotional blog, let's talk about feelings) is easily cooled. The cooling of emotions directly leads to the weakening of women's sexual demands, which is a vicious circle. When two people are just together, these subtle psychological differences are easily ignored and overcome because of their newness and curiosity about each other. However, once they enter a stable situation, various small flaws in their sex life will easily become apparent.

C. He is busy, but I am even busier

After having a stable partner, a man will be more likely to focus on his career, and work and social activities will take up most of his time. After a certain amount of their time is divided between work and social activities, professional women still have to worry about their children and family. The quality and quantity of sex life are mostly not guaranteed. After investigation, sex experts pointed out that professional couples lack undisturbed non-sleeping time to go to bed together, which seriously affects their sex life and the maintenance of the quality of their relationship.

Repair plan

1. Explore neglected sex opportunities

If you have ten minutes available, try having quick sex. This may sound like ridiculous advice, but you won’t know until you try it. Sometimes, rapid sex is not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, many couples appreciate the stimulation brought by rapid sex, which can create a sense of secret between the two of them.

2. Touch each other frequently

The survey shows that apart from sex, many couples rarely touch each other affectionately. They may feel uncomfortable with this, and touching each other frequently is the best technique to eliminate emotional (emotional blog, emotional talk) psychological barriers. Make sure to get in the habit of touching your partner, such as holding his hand during a movie, running your fingers up and down his upper arm while watching TV together, and exchanging kisses from time to time. Don't constantly send the message "don't come near me" to your partner. Even if he smudges your freshly applied lipstick when he kisses you in the morning, reapplying makeup is obviously insignificant compared to the signal that he still loves you.

3. Be bold and say what you want him to do

Don't let him act like a drudge in bed trying to please you. If you want him to stay in a certain position, say so. When he meets your requirements, you should let him know. If he does something wrong, don't blame him maliciously. Express it in a more gentle way and say that you prefer this or that.

4. Expand your sexual life space

The bed shouldn't be the only place where you two have sex. When you get excited at home, but on the way to the bedroom, there will always be a lot of distractions and you will quickly lose your enthusiasm. Experts point out that if you want to enjoy more and better sex, you should act immediately when you are aroused. The dining room, carpet, sofa... can all be great places for you to have fun.

5. Try new approaches

Of course, a monotonous sex lifestyle is extremely boring, but if you dare to try it, you will definitely get unexpected rewards. These attempts can be easily obtained from relevant books, so don't worry about your imagination.

6. Plan your sex life journey

Plan with him a trip that both of you have never tried before but that can arouse your desire the most, so that you two can have the intimate feeling of knowing each other for the first time.

Everyone knows that no matter whether it is a man or a woman, it is impossible for them to not give anything in their shared sex life, nor is it possible for them to not expect anything in return. Suppose two people jointly invest in a company. Of course, no one wants to always suffer losses in a partnership, and they cannot tolerate the other party always taking advantage for a long time. It's that simple.