10 Tips to Improve Communication Through Listening

Of course, there are skills to listening, and it is important to let the other person know that you are paying attention. Here are ten ways to improve your listening skills:

Eliminate external and internal distractions

External and internal distractions are the main factors that hinder listening. Therefore, the first way to improve your listening skills is to eliminate distractions as much as possible. You must focus your attention completely on the other person in order to understand his or her body language, what he or she said or did not say, and the feelings and meaning that his or her words represent.

Encourage the other person to speak first

First of all, listening to others is a form of courtesy. Being willing to listen means that we are willing to objectively consider other people's views. This will make the person speaking feel that we respect his or her opinions, which will help us build a harmonious relationship and accept each other.

Second, encouraging the other person to speak first can make the conversation less competitive. Our listening fosters an open atmosphere and facilitates the exchange of ideas. Since the speaker does not have to worry about the pressure of competition, he can concentrate on grasping the key points instead of being busy looking for excuses for his contradictions.

Third, when the other party presents his or her opinion first, you have the opportunity to grasp the areas of agreement between the two parties before expressing your own opinion. Listening can make the other party more willing to accept your opinions, making it easier for you to convince the other party when you speak again.

Use and observe body language

When we are talking to people, even before we open our mouths, our inner feelings are clearly expressed through our body language. If the listener has a closed or cold attitude, the speaker will naturally be particularly concerned about his or her own actions and will be less willing to open up. On the other hand. If the listener is open and interested, it means that he is willing to accept the other person and wants to understand the other person's ideas, and the speaker will be encouraged. These body languages ​​include: smiling naturally, not crossing your arms, not putting your hands on your face, leaning forward slightly, looking into the other person's eyes often, and nodding.

Avoid interrupting others unless necessary

People who are good at listening to others will not interrupt others just because they want to emphasize some minor details, correct some unimportant parts of what the other person said, suddenly change the subject, or finish a sentence that they just didn't finish. Frequent interruption of others means that we are not good at listening, have aggressive personalities, are impolite, and are difficult to communicate with.

Although interrupting others is considered impolite, it is an exception if it is the "ping-pong effect". The so-called "ping-pong effect" means that the listener should ask many to-the-point questions or express some opinions and feelings in a timely manner to respond to the other party's statement.

Also, if you miss something or don't understand something, you should quickly raise your questions when the other person pauses.

Listen for keywords

The so-called keywords refer to words that describe specific facts. These words reveal certain information and also show the other party's interests and emotions. Through keywords, you can see the other person's favorite topics and the speaker's trust in you.

In addition, finding out the key words in the other person's words can also help us decide how to respond to what they say. As long as we include the key content of what the other person said in the questions or comments we ask, the other person can feel that you are very interested in or concerned about what he said.

Reactive Listening

Reactive listening, which involves restating what you have just heard, is an important communication skill. Our reactions let the other person know that we are listening to him and that we understand what he is saying. However, reactive listening is not like a parrot, saying whatever the other person says. Instead, you should use your own words to briefly state the other person's key points. For example, "You said that the house you live in is by the sea? I think the sunset there must be beautiful."

The main benefit of reactive listening is that it makes the other person feel important, helps you grasp the other person's key points, and keeps the conversation from being interrupted.

Figure out the hints

Many people do not dare to directly express their true thoughts and feelings. They often use narratives, questions, and hints to express their inner thoughts and feelings. However, such suggestive statements hinder communication because if they encounter bad listeners, the intention and content of their words are often misunderstood, which may eventually lead to gaffes or verbal conflicts between both parties. Therefore, once you encounter words that are highly suggestive, you should encourage the person who is speaking to make his or her words clearer.

Find the key points and focus on them. It may be interesting to discuss the details of the problem, but finding the key points in the other person's words and focusing on them will make it easier for us to understand the whole problem from the other person's point of view. As long as we stop paying attention to the details, we will not waste precious time or make wrong assumptions by not hearing the key points of what the other person is saying or missing the main content.

Review secretly, sort out the key points, and come up with your own conclusions

When we talk to people, we usually have a few seconds to review what the other person said in our mind and sort out the key points. We must eliminate irrelevant details, focus on the main points the other person wants to say and his main ideas, and memorize these points and ideas in our minds.

Secretly reviewing and sorting out the key points can also help us continue to ask questions. If we can point out places where the other person is only half-said or unclear, the speaker knows that we are listening to him and are trying hard to fully understand what he is saying. If we are not sure which points or ideas the other party values ​​more, we can use asking to let him know that we pay attention to the content of the conversation.

Accept the speaker's point of view

If we fail to accept the speaker’s point of view, we may miss many opportunities and fail to build rapport with the other person. Even if the person speaking has different views and feelings about the matter, or even the conclusions they reach, than we do, they can still stick to their own views, conclusions, and feelings.

Respect the speaker's point of view

It can let the other person know that we have been listening and that we understand what he said. Although we may not necessarily agree with his point of view, we still respect his ideas. If we are unable to accept the other person's point of view, it will be difficult for us to accept each other or build a harmonious relationship together. In addition, it can also help the speaker build confidence and make him more able to accept different opinions from others.