Why do you cheat when you have a lovely wife?

Shakespeare once said that whoever becomes a prisoner of the green demon will be fooled. Many marriage experts and writers are accustomed to regarding "affair" as the "green demon" of marriage. If a lifestyle remains unchanged for a long time, it is inevitable that you will feel bored, and gradually turn from familiarity and habit to indifference, just like eating the same delicacy every meal will also make you tired of it. At this time, people's attention is easily attracted by novel targets. But no matter what the reason, neither the betrayer nor the betrayed should easily succumb to an affair.

Nine psychological reasons why men cheat

Cheating is an extramarital affair, which generally includes prostitution, one-night stands, extramarital lovers, and mistresses. It can be said that these are immoral or illegal behaviors and should be condemned or punished by law. However, condemnation and sanctions have not solved the problem to this day, and it has become more and more serious. What is the reason? Through investigations on patients with STDs and those who have extramarital sex over the past decade, we have concluded that the psychological factors that lead to cheating are as follows:

One is curiosity.

Everyone has curiosity, and when it comes to sex, men are more exploratory. If explored only between couples, it would add color to a legal sex life. However, some men with poor self-control may engage in extramarital sex due to the attraction of unknown mysteries such as "If my wife is like this, what will other women be like?" If he finds that having sex with other women is no different from having sex with his wife, or is not as good as having sex with his wife, and may also cause some trouble, then he may stop. If he finds that the taste of "wild flowers" is indeed different, and he has a certain financial ability or charm, he may also become addicted to them.

The second is the spirit of adventure.

The last two sentences of the saying “A wife is not as good as a concubine, a concubine is not as good as a maid, and a maid is not as good as a secret lover” are a reflection of the adventurous mentality. Men are usually more adventurous than women. If they use this spirit in their sexual life, they may be able to create some new things or add some interest to their sexual life. But if used on other women, there will be problems. Some men may return to their families when they encounter setbacks in their sexual adventures, such as developing sexual dysfunction, contracting or fearing sexually transmitted diseases. Some men enjoy taking risks, which is dangerous. There are also some men who can only get sexual pleasure or extraordinary sexual experience through sexual adventures, and they may repeat the same mistakes.

The third is the psychology of conquest.

Both men and women have the desire to conquer. When a man chases a woman and wins her heart, or a woman takes a man under her spell, both of these satisfy the psychological desire to conquer. After marriage, some men will conquer other women to satisfy their desire to conquer in order to show their abilities, to find confidence, or because they are still lustful. The "sexual" purpose of conquering a woman can be divided into several aspects: (1) Capturing a woman's heart and body. (2) He only wants to possess a woman’s body. (3) Make a woman feel like she is dying during sex to demonstrate his sexual ability. (4) There is also a special phenomenon. Some men like to watch women’s sexual responses, especially their orgasm responses. They do this by conquering different women and even by visiting prostitutes. In this regard, Ximen Qing in "Jin Ping Mei" is a typical example. He had six wives and concubines at home, and he also raped other people's wives and daughters and kept prostitutes. There were more than a dozen women who had sexual relations with Ximen Qing. He satisfied himself by constantly conquering women. The harder it was to get a woman, the more it aroused his desire to conquer her.

Fourth is the compensation psychology.

The causes of men's compensatory psychology are as follows: (1) The wife is unable to satisfy her husband due to sexual dysfunction, sexual psychological disorder, injury or illness, or is unwilling to satisfy her husband due to incorrect sexual concepts, and even uses sexual punishment as a means to resolve marital conflicts. (2) The wife may be of poor figure or appearance, or may be old and ugly, or may be disabled due to injury or illness, etc. (3) A wife who is overbearing and vicious will seriously undermine her husband’s self-esteem, making it easy for him to be seduced by the affection outside and develop a sexual relationship, or even divorce. (4) The husband’s sexual desire is too strong and the wife finds it difficult to satisfy him.

Five is the mentality of revenge.

Sexual revenge is a way of seeking psychological balance because the wife has cheated on him, is not a virgin, or has been toyed with by women.

Sixth, the competitive mentality.

In certain situations, if you back down when your friends are taking action, it would be too humiliating and you may end up hurting others; or you may do something out of a desire to be strong after making a bet or being instigated by others.

Seven is the feeling of being coerced.

If you attend pornographic places with your leader and your leader goes there, you will inevitably lose his trust if you don't, so you have to go along with him.

Eight is animal instinct.

Most animals do not practice monogamy, and this animal attribute also exists in human nature; when social constraints do not work, the true nature of animals will be revealed. For example, when another woman actively pursues and seduces him, he cannot withstand the temptation of throwing himself into her arms, and eventually loses his virginity and integrity.

Nine is the psychology of fun.

Some men are influenced by the Western trend of lust, the idea of ​​living for the moment, or the old concept of having three wives and four concubines. They cannot control their lustful consciousness and desire, cannot resist the temptation of those unhealthy tendencies in society, have lost their morals, and take pleasure in playing with women. Some women are lazy, greedy for money, pursue pleasure, and have no morals, which are also reasons that lead men to cheat.

These three types of people are most likely to cheat

Generally speaking, there are three types of people who are most likely to have an affair based on their personality:

Psychologically immature people: This type of people usually treat their marriage partners as their own parents. Because they have not grown up psychologically, they do not follow the principle of fairness in interpersonal relationships. In marriage, they only want to take and are unwilling to take responsibility. So whenever they feel dissatisfied, they will look for someone outside of their marriage who can care about them.

People who are born to be philandering: This type of people have personality defects and need to satisfy their insatiable and elusive desires through constant manipulation and conquest of third parties, through repeated extramarital affairs, in order to gain psychological and sexual stimulation and temporarily soothe the uneasy feeling in their hearts. They usually think that life is just a game.

People with high emotional intelligence but poor stability: People with high emotional intelligence are more aware of paying attention to other people's feelings, and their unintentional actions will win the favor of the opposite sex, so they are particularly popular with the opposite sex. But if the other person lacks determination and stability, it is easy to fall in love.