A man with an unfaithful wife

A male netizen wrote to confide in us that he had discovered his wife was having an affair and he didn't know what to do. In this era of material desire, cheating seems to have become a common occurrence. His experience and reaction represent the common doubts of some men. Let's talk about what a husband should do after his wife cheats on him based on some cases.

User case: Wife cheated on him but refused to divorce

I recently discovered that my wife was cheating on me. I am very distressed and don’t know what to do.

We have been married for more than three years. After marriage, she refused to live with my parents, so we moved out. After I moved out, my dad got so angry that he didn't let me work in the store. After losing my job, I found a job. Since I had just joined the company, my salary was only a little over 3,000 yuan, and I had to travel frequently.

She blames me for not making enough money and always argues with me. In fact, she also has a salary, which is more than 3,000 yuan. It was more than enough for two people to live on, but she spent money lavishly, buying clothes or cosmetics every day, and also wanting to eat and drink nice food. I have to buy her a gift no matter what holiday it is. If you buy something that is too cheap, she will be unhappy.

At the end of last year, my salary increased to four thousand, and at the same time, my work became busier and I traveled more frequently. At that time, when she saw me chatting with other women, she would get jealous and suspect that I was cheating on her. We often quarrel, and she even goes into a cold war with me. Sometimes, even after two or three days of coaxing her, it still doesn't work. I feel so tired.

Not long ago, I found out that she had an affair with a man who had a family and was a wealthy boss. She said that the man bought everything for her and was even prepared to give her an apartment, and asked me to leave her alone. I wanted a divorce, but she refused. In fact, I still don’t want to get divorced in my heart. After all, we are in a free relationship and have an emotional foundation. I can accept her shortcomings, but I cannot tolerate her cheating. Now I don’t know what to do. Please help and give me some advice.

Expert interpretation: Men should do these 4 things after their wives cheat on them

When a woman cheats, it is often because there is some emotional deficiency in the marriage that cannot meet her inner needs, so she places her hopes on others. After a woman cheats on her husband, the following 4 things should be done by the man:

1. Reflect and examine the problems in your marriage.

Many women cheat because they are disappointed with their marriage and their husbands and take extreme measures to pursue so-called warmth and love to fill the loneliness and emptiness in their hearts. When you find out that your wife has cheated on you, you should reflect on yourself in time, reflect on whether you have done something wrong, and reflect on the problems that exist in your marriage.

2. Repair and make efforts to make up for the lost feelings between husband and wife.

If you still love her, if you don't want to get divorced, and if you have found the problems between you, then you can consider giving her another chance. Communicate first and talk to each other with an open heart. Of course, the prerequisite is that she is willing to completely sever ties with others. This is actually a process of expressing determination to each other, allowing each other to trust each other again and give each other another chance.

3. Analyze who is the most suitable person for the child to follow and the issue of property distribution.

If you have children, think more about their future. Objectively analyze who is more suitable for the child to live with, and discuss who will have custody of the child before divorcing. In addition, you must consider the distribution of property and child support plans, and think more about your children.

4. Determine whether divorce is inevitable.

Never fall in love blindly and never divorce rashly. If she refuses to change her ways, then what is the point of a marriage that is in name only? Divorcing at this time would be a responsibility to yourself, your family or your children. Of course, before divorcing, you must think clearly whether the relationship is really hopeless and whether it is impossible to be together again. Make a decision after fighting hard for it, and don't divorce hastily.