A happy man doesn't dwell on the past.

When a woman succeeds, for the sake of love and family, she will do everything she can to keep these secrets and not "destroy herself" in front of her husband. However, after reading some novels and watching some film and television works, I can't help but identify myself with them and worry that the "deception of love" back then will become a time bomb and affect the stability of my marriage. In fact, whether the past will become a bomb and whether a man will hold a grudge for life still depends on whether you truly love him.

In the TV series "Twenty Years of Love" which has just been airing on CCTV, there is a plot that talks about how a man hates being "cheated" by a woman. Du Zhiming, a successful boss, met his first love Feng Xinliu while trying to attract foreign investment. He was very surprised to learn that Xinliu pretended to break up with him more than ten years ago in order to motivate him to leave the factory and go to university, and even secretly sent him review materials with a letter explaining the misunderstanding. Because Zhiming had always thought that the information was found for him by his current wife Lin Yue, and he had no idea that there was such a letter back then. Xin Liu got married hastily after Zhiming and Lin Yue got married, but divorced because her husband had an affair. In order to make up for his lover, Zhiming decided to pursue Xinliu again, frequently inviting her to dinner and even buying her a high-end apartment. At the same time, he angrily accused his wife: "Our marriage itself is a mistake, because you cheated on me from the beginning." Lin Yue replied aggrievedly: "I have been with you for so many years, and except for hiding a letter, I have never done anything to let you down."

Zhang Dong, a psychologist at Beijing Huilongguan Hospital, analyzed that for many men, if their married life is happy and they love each other, then they will not care too much even if they know that their wives have used some tricks to get them. For some men, if they have a happy life but still make a big fuss about "digging up the past", it is very likely that they are making excuses for their extramarital affairs. Women do not need to blame themselves too much, but should think about how to win back their husbands' hearts.

When facing a marriage crisis, a smart wife should take the initiative to change things that are not good for herself, understand her husband more, and be more tolerant and forgiving in the marriage. In "Twenty Years of Love", Lin Yue did just that. She made her life more fulfilling and stopped pestering Zhiming. Instead, she let him go find the so-called "true love". In the end, Zhiming returned to his family.

Let’s talk about those two “love scams” ​​again. They should be a warning to some women. One is that Xinliu used provocation to pretend to break up with Zhiming. Although she seems to care about him, she actually shows her lack of confidence in love and adds additional conditions to love. Deep down in her heart, she still cares about Zhiming's identity as a worker. In contrast, Lin Yue firmly believes that Zhiming is a "blue chip stock" and that regardless of whether this man can succeed, he is her goal. For such a simple purpose, she adds skills to her love offensive, hiding the letter at the critical moment and lying that she helped find the review materials. She continues to pursue and support Zhiming, and eventually establishes a family with him. In the face of true love, does this little mistake seem insignificant?